Re:Union Online
Sports -
FINAL COUNTDOWN FOR STEPHEN KENNY Laura Brannan
Challenge Cup preview
Dunfermline Athletic v St. Johnstone
Sunday 25th November 2007
STEPHEN Kenny believes winning the Challenge Cup on Sunday will kick start Dunfermline’s season and help reinstall confidence to both the team and the fans.
Sitting second bottom of the Irn Bru First Division and having only won three games, the manager wants to grasp the opportunity to turn things around.
With his future in doubt and many fans losing faith, Kenny knows time is against him. He said, “A lot of people have been disappointed we’ve underachieved so far this season, so to win a trophy would be great.”
Having recently suffered heavy defeats, including 3-0, 4-0 and 5-0, confidence amongst fans is understandably low. The manager is aware of the competition’s importance saying, “You have to respond to different periods in different ways, winning a cup would be great for the fans.”
A cup final victory is long overdue for the Fifers who have not won a trophy since 1968 when they defeated Hearts 3-1 in the Scottish Cup. Kenny understands the depths which Dunfermline have sunk to in recent times and says, “We’ve given ourselves a difficult mountain to climb but it’s one we’re not going to give up on.”
Dunfermline’s poor run in the league is Kenny’s main concern but does not mean he will be pushing Sunday’s clash with St. Johnstone aside. He sees them as serious challengers for both the Challenge Cup and promotion.
Having highlighted Kenny Deuchar and Andy Jackson as St. Johnstone’s key players he backed his own strike force to do the job on Sunday. “Tam McManus and Mark Burchill are an exciting partnership and they can be the difference for us.”
The Challenge Cup is a step down for the East End Club who were playing against Celtic in the Scottish Cup Final at a sold out Hampden only five months ago. But Kenny is adamant this will not affect the player’s motivation. He said, “The build up has been slow but we want to make sure we peak on Sunday, that’s the main thing.”
Following May’s Cup Final defeat, the players are desperate for a taste of glory. Defender Calum Woods is ready for it to be his turn, saying “I was left out of the squad for the Scottish Cup Final which was hard to take, so I’d like to get my chance this time.”
Woods also wants to win the trophy for the fans; “The recent results have been hard for fans to take, so we want a victory to say thank you for sticking by us.”
Both games against St Johnstone this season have been close and ended in draws, which should hopefully provide the makings of an entertaining cup final.
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Arts -
Has the question of how Master Shake, Frylock and Meatwad were created been nagging you for a while? That’s Master Shake, the obnoxious milkshake, Frylock, the sarcastic box of flying French fries and Meatwad, the dim wad of meat, supposed crime fighters, in case you were wondering. Whether you are a fan of Aqua Teen Hunger Force or not, the answer is probably ‘no’. In any event, the answer to the question provided in Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theatres is so deliberately convoluted and ludicrous that it’s almost pointless even to bring it up. I do so because pointlessness seems to be the ethos of Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
One of the most popular series on Adult Swim, a strand of comedy animation programming found on Cartoon Network in the US and Bravo in the UK, ATHF is made by many of the former cast and crew of Space Ghost Coast To Coast. It features the same crude, characters-barely-move animation of that show and the same dialogue-focused sarcastic humour, but none of the restraint. Whatever pops into the writers’ heads is what makes up the characters and plots. This show is purposefully stupid and proud of it.
The series comes in twelve minute episodes and, if stumbled upon at 3am, just as you’ve decided not to reheat that take-away in favour of just eating it cold, it is entirely watchable and frequently amusing. The movie, however, lasts 82 minutes. Long minutes. What has been added to the formula to make the step up to feature length film is uncensored, lengthy and often inventive swearing but little else. The peppering of profanity isn’t a problem, as it’s well timed, making for some amusing exchanges between the characters. The failure here is a twelve minute format stretched out way too thin.
The plot involves time travel and an exercise machine of mass destruction, as well as a talking slice of water melon whose sidekick is voiced by Neil Peart, the drummer and lyricist of Rush. However, it is the exchanges between the three ‘heroes’ and the various other creatures they encounter that drive the film (albeit at a meandering pace).
Fans of the series should be happy to cough up for this regardless of its flaws. The DVD comes packed with extras and, it can always been watched in twelve minute chunks to make it more digestible.
David Clark
I know a couple, who shall for obvious reasons remain nameless, who last year booked a romantic weekend away at a luxury hotel. On arriving at their destination they were shown to their room. They unpacked, ordered a bottle of wine and a slap-up meal from room service, climbed into the king size bed and didn’t leave it for two straight days.
On returning home, as you would expect, people asked how their weekend was. “Great”, they said, “Hotel was lovely, food was great”. “And what did you do?” asked their friends, at which point this couple’s faces reddened. For good reason. They had taken with them a DVD player which they plugged into the hotel room’s widescreen TV and used to watch Lost: Series Two. All of it. In two days. That’s 1056 minutes of television. Over seventeen and a half hours of far-fetched televisual drama in a two day “romantic” getaway. A prime example of the cultural phenomenon known as the Box Set Binge.
The Box Set Binge is not to be confused with the TV Binge. Who amongst us hasn’t staggered from bed to couch one morning, equipped with only a bottle of Irn-Bru and a duvet, suffering a hangover through This Morning, Neighbours, Diagnosis:Murder and then Neighbours again? The TV binge is as much a part of our culture as its ideological ally, the fake sick day, but it’s a passive binge, the result of being too lazy to do anything worthwhile. The Box Set Binge is a different beast altogether, a wilful, conscious decision to stick two fingers up at TV schedulers and cram a seasons worth of drama into less than a week.
It’s a phenomenon which seems to be striking all types of people. I know a successful architect who is ignoring Heroes on TV because he thinks it’ll be better to watch “as a whole story”. My younger brother is probably damaging his career by turning up at work like a half-shut scalpel after watching “a few” episodes of Nip/Tuck until the early hours. I put off writing this column for two days because Amazon delivered The Wire: Season 3 at the weekend.
There’s an old adage that says “You can’t have too much of a good thing” and in this case it would be easy to agree. Better to be watching quality drama than lifestyle programming or Celebrity Who Do You Think Your Swapping Your Dance Partner For On Ice? Or so you would think. Unfortunately, that runs against every piece of health advice we are being given these days.
Binge on food and it’s a fair bet that your friends will be telling you that you “suit” a little weight after one week, asking when you were last at The Arc by the second week and hiding the pastries within a month. Binge on alcohol and you can probably bet that in some time in the future you’ll be lying on a hospital bed as a doctor presses a stethoscope to your liver and swears he can hear it slurring its way through The Pogues Greatest Hits. Binge on quality US drama, what’s the worst that can happen?
My worry is this. If you spent a day hanging out with Bob Geldof it’s unlikely you would walk away with at least a vague idea that helping Africa in some way might not be a bad thing. Spend a full 24 hours immersed in the life of Jack Bauer and there has to be a fair chance you’ll be talking in a fierce and strangely loud whisper, most probably irritating everyone you come in contact with. A weekend immersed in the problems of the characters in Lost and every number you see for weeks will be filled with a strange and worrying significance. A binge on The Sopranos and you may find yourself contemplating serious consequences for the good friend who hasn’t paid back that tenner he owes.
Now I’m usually the type of guy who wants less government interference instead of more but action has to be taken here to help those who can’t help themselves. Couldn’t the Department of Culture, Media and Sport do something useful for a change? A unit system, just like the one used for alcohol, could save many from being lost in imaginary worlds, from ruining their social lives, from putting excessive wear and tear on the sofas in their homes. All we need is a recommended weekly allowance of units (if it turns out later the figures were plucked out of the air, who cares?) and a unit guide on the back of each box. Say 6 units a week, where a standard US drama like Dexter or CSI is one unit and an episode of Seinfeld or Curb is ½. Unlike alcohol, mixing will be positively recommended and doubtless future studies by earnest academics like ourselves will show that box sets can be positively healthy if used in moderation.
Until these changes come we’ll no doubt carry on bingeing, our nagging sense of guilt drowned out by the sound of the telly and if one thought invades the blissful experience of total immersion in a good series it’ll be this. That while we watch back to back episodes on the couch with a beer and a frozen pizza that somewhere out there someone is watching the same box set in a king size bed, in a luxury hotel with a good bottle of wine and a slap-up meal from room service.
Andy Coyle
Fashion -
New Season – New Look
Gillian West
Fashion trends come and go quicker than Amy Winehouse can go through hairspray and eyeliner. New seasons mean new trends. Here’s our guide to looking good this season without doing to much damage to your bank balance.
NAVY NAILS
Dark nails are very popular this Autumn/Winter. After being seen on the likes of Sienna and Posh the trapped-in-a-car door look is exceptionally popular and surprisingly attractive. This colour is best kept for short nails to avoid the Cruella De Vil vibe. Try Barry M’s Nail Paint in Navy, £2.95.
MARY JANES
Ever since Miu Miu introduced their double strapped Mary Janes into the footwear world they have been the envy of many a fashionista, but with a price tag of £… they are beyond many a student’s budget. Luckily this look has trickled onto the High Street and most stores have their own variation on the look. For a night time look go for the popular patent option. However, Topshop have a daytime pair to die for complete with chunky heel for the affordable price of £55.
STATEMENT EYELINER
Yes, surprisingly the Amy Winehouse look has caught on -beehive optional! – Liquid eyeliner is the look to go for this season. A steady hand is a must for this and don’t forget practice makes perfect so don’t give up, you will end up with eyeliner all over your face the first time you experiment! But with a little persistence you will finally master the look. Word of advice though - it’s not a good idea to try and top it up after a few glasses of vino on a night out!
BOOTLEG JEANS
After months of praying it looks like the skinny jeans reign of terror over the fashion world may finally be over. The bootleg jean is the perfect option for “anti-skinnies” everywhere who are fed up with looking like emo kids. Topshop, Miss Selfridge and New Look all have fantastic ranges of jeans but if your looking for something special the Penelope and Monica Cruz range for Mango do a terrific dark denim pair with stitching detail for £55 - pricey but worth the investment.
KATE MOSS PERFUME
La Moss strikes on a winner again. Kate’s debut perfume is surprisingly mature and an immediate dressing table classic. The scent is versatile enough to be used day to day as it’s not totally overpowering. The only downside is it doesn’t last too long once applied. But with decent prices starting at £29 for 30ml you can afford to be generous with it.
Music -
Your sound
Chris Panks
In local news, Your Sound, the leading Glasgow showcase for unsigned and local acts re-launched at King Tut’s Wah Wah Hut on Sunday October 7. The event marked the start of term 3 and was kicked off with a seminar on vocal techniques for all the city’s budding singers.
As usual, the playlist was made up entirely of unsigned and promising acts from around Glasgow and the decks were watched over by Craig Grant of former artists of the month, Union of Knives.
Lloyd Wylie. Lead Guitarist of Magma Child said: “This is our first time here, but it’s clearly a great thing that helps out local bands.” He continued: “This is going to do nothing but raise our profile.”
There is a huge mix of people present and has the slight resemblance of a well soundtracked freshers fair. In one corner journalists schmooze with bands like artists of the month runners up Twin Atlantic. In another, studios try to persuade the next big things to come record with them.
The bands featured on the playlist are as varied and eclectic as the people who populate the room - from the electro hypnotism of 7wvwv to the rockabilly stylings of The Retrosexuals, there truly is something for everyone.
Rachel Grimes, the mastermind of the initiative, said: “We’re delighted by the success of Your Sound so far. Independent acts have really embraced the initiative’s living, breathing myspace ethos.”
She continued: “There’s such a wealth of talent in Scotland that it’s getting even harder for us to pick just one Artist of the Month.”
The event is on the first Sunday of every month, and the next event will feature a seminar on music sales and distribution, which kicks off at 2:30. The main event begins at 4 and is free to all. I highly recommend.
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